Angel vs. Demon: Off-Beige

Me: “She slipped on the off-white jacket before checking the pockets to see what was left inside. The mark had no money, no ID, and no cell phone. Was the man trying to make her job easier?” I look up at my audience. “What do you think?”

Angel: “Well the description is okay, but a little bland. Is it alright to say that the character wore an off-white jacket? It sounds a little… I don’t know-”

Demon: “Boring. You need another word for that color. Everyone uses it. Be original.”

Angel: “What’s another word for off-white?”

Demon: “Egg shell.”

Angel: “Beige.”

Demon: “Tan?”

Angel: “Too brown.”

Demon: “Cream, maybe?”

Me: “Ecru.”

Angel: “Bless you!”

Demon: “Gesundheit!

Me: “What?”

Demon: “It’s German for good health… you know for your sneeze.”

Angel: “You really should cover your mouth when you sneeze. Are you catching a cold?”

Me: “… I said ecru… I was suggesting a word you might be trying to find: ecru not achoo.”

Angel: “That’s a word?”

Demon: “Hell, enunciate!”

Me: “… I need an aspirin.”


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